I Have Never Minded, My Entire Life

You can’t choose your parents. That’s how we are all born.

For those fortunate, being born into a great family is a blessing. I am not the lucky one.

Bad Memories

My father left me with my mom when I was just one month old. My broken-hearted mom hates to see me and prefers to enjoy her single life again. She left me with my grandparents most of the time.

I didn’t mind that.

I grew up in poor conditions. I ate rice and fried eggs for every meal. I got bullied and underestimated by my classmates during primary school. Kind people always see me with their sad eyes.

Once my grandparents were busy with their jobs, they left me with our neighbor. He is a young man and seems like a good guy (maybe in the eyes of my family). At that time, perhaps I was about five or something I forgot. But when I was 25, a memory suddenly passed that he did an abusive act to me.

What can I do?

Nothing.

This memory stuck in my head. But nobody can change their past, including me.

So, I didn’t mind that.

Once I was in junior high school, I started to feel the feeling of shame as a kid from a low-economic family. Most students go to school with good vehicles while I am walking. The upper-middle class wore shiny shoes, while I wore low-quality ones that I always pulled up carefully so they wouldn’t gape.

At least I am grateful that I have a pair of shoes for school cause I have no money to buy a good one. After school, there’s no option other than to take my shoes off and walk.

For something in the past that I can’t change, I didn’t mind.

Do you have any bad memories stuck in your head?

Good Memories

At least one or more good things will also come to us, right?

Yes, me too.

There are also situations where we can feel joy, excitement, and happiness despite bad memories that we can’t force to reject.

What’s mine?

I represented my elementary school in the gymnastics championship and won many gold medals.

I am just an innocent kid who has no idea about competition. It makes me proud of myself. People around me are proud of me. So, I became addicted to sports competitions.

The fact that I got the highest score for the national exam in my junior high school also surprisingly brings satisfaction. And I remember, no effort at all. I am not the kind of kid who learns all the time. Mostly, I play around.

God’s plan is always better than mine. I was selected to attend a boarding school with a three-year scholarship. This place changes and helps me build a great character, especially being independent.

After that, I got so many achievements in sports. I do taekwondo and represent my province. I play cricket and represent my country. I was also selected to represent my country in the Indonesia-Canada Youth Exchange Program at age 18. Canada is the first foreign country I ever visited. It was mind-blowing.

I didn’t mind that.

Do you have any good memories that stuck in your head?

What Memories Come to You?

If you suddenly remember your bad memories (as I believe bad memories will come first), try to remember your good ones.

The Rainbow appears after rain.

For indeed, with hardship [will be] ease.
Al-Inshirah: Verse 5

Please stop arguing that you can’t do better in life because of your past or claiming that you have the most regretful trauma than anyone else.

We have it all, pal.

If you think, no, I have more bad memories.

Then hold up cause more good things will soon happen to you. You need to wait and keep going with life.

Takeaway

Those memories that stuck in your head shape you as this unique person now. Don’t feel ashamed or afraid of other people’s judgment.

Read this with your highest focus: “For bad memories, good memories, my past and future. I accept all of those feelings I should feel.

I have never minded, my entire life.